Tuesday, September 18, 2007

The Benefits Of Global Warming

We never hear the good news about global warming and it's counterbalancing effect to the relatively cold world from which we have only recently emerged. It's not doom and gloom as the faithful would have you believe. One Canadian writer said. "Global warming hmmm - and that negatively effects me how?"

Let's consider the upside for once. I have yet to hear anything good from the mainstream media except how Gore and his band of hucksters are making out with billions of dollars from the faithful. While that is I suppose good news for them, it leaves me restless to tell the rest of the bright side.

Global warming in our fortunate generation. What luck! There will be: (Check these links from scientific studies to verify)

Fewer heart attacks while shoveling snow
Fewer cases of frostbite
More farmland in the northern latitudes
More coral reef growth
Fewer hurricanes
Lots of fuel saved with the opening of the Northwest Passage (4,000 miles less travel)
Lower home insurance premiums
Shrinking deserts
Fewer avalanche deaths
Less ice related injuries
Fewer cold related deaths (vastly outweighing heat related deaths from warming)
Easier access to oil in high northern latitudes
More converts to the vegan diet (leaving more meat for us!)
More bananas
Better Beer
Birds return early for the summer
New businesses
Early spring
Extinction of leaches (can't say I'll miss them)
Fish catches increase
Forest expansion (more camping destinations - Yeah!)
Increased harvests
Lawyers make out like bandits (no surprise here)
Surf's up dude!
Abundance of calamari (sushi anyone?)
Fewer ticks (won't miss them either)
Increased tourism
More colorful trees
Tropics expand
More free Live Earth concerts

Above is a list of just a few of the benefits of global warming. We can't even imagine yet what great things another degree of warming might bring in the next 30 years. We're only seeing the tip of the global warming ice berg here!

I think I'll invest in Al Gore's carbon forgiveness company and make a killing!





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